Ahh presents! If you’re lucky your friends and family members know you well enough to get you just what you want. But…sometimes…even the people we love get it really, really, really….WRONG!
Here are the Top 10 Gifts that this Beauty Junkie does NOT want to get this Holiday Season!
Number 1 and 2: The Snuggie!
Please Santa do not bless me with a Snuggie. There could be a major Global Warming with an arctic blast so intense that it’ll shake my house but I still DO not want to wrap myself in a felt-like robe and snuggle on my couch to watch telly.
No. Just no.
This is what warm lambie blankets are for. Damn Bath and Body Works for not bringing them back this year.
I believe even Wil Wheaton has expressed a strong dislike of the Camouflage Snuggie…I knew I loved that geek for a reason. I can only think to myself WHY would they make a Camouflage at all?! WTH!?
And speaking of Snuggies…please don’t gift my dog with one either.
Snuggies are on the Do Not Want Christmas List.
P.S. His and her Snuggies and Outdoor Snuggies are also OUT of the question!
Number 3: The Clapper.
I have not reached a point in my life where I am too lazy to get off my butt and turn the lights or TV off. I do not want to depend on clapping to turn things off in my life.
This is just lame.
Do not gift me with a Clapper, I will laugh at you if you do.
Number 4: Cheap Makeup
Please don’t gift me with a mega makeup palette you purchased at CVS with the Color Workshop or some other lame company’s name printed on it.
You should know better, for shame!
Number 5: Bad Sweaters.
Yes, Colin Firth did make it rather endearing to sport a REALLY bad Christmas sweater but I, on the other hand, do NOT want a Christmas sweater for Christmas.
Please don’t gift me with a green sweater and a big Santa Claus. It’s cute for my dear old mum to prance around in one but not me, k?
Number 6: The Obama Chia Pet or any Chia Pet for that matter.
I consider myself an upstanding American Citizen however I do not want a pottery vase shaped like my President’s head that sports little green sprouts in it when I add water.
No, no, no really bad gift.
By the way, this applies to the Shrek, SpongeBob, Lady Liberty, and Original Chia Pet creations.
For some reason or another children DO not dig Santa. Sit them on a strange old man’s lap with a beard and they will cry about 95.9% of the time. Yes, I have had friends who have gifted me with photos of their children sitting on dear Old Saint Nick’s lap and crying their little hearts out.
WHY are you torturing your children this way? And me for that matter.
Do not want your Christmas photo, k, thanks.
Number 8: Sausage, Cheese, or other food that looks like it could survive a nuclear blast!
Please don’t gift me with food or snacks that have an expiration date well after I’m dead and gone.
I don’t need to be reminded how hairy I am.
Number 10: FRUIT CAKE!
No, just NO! God, no!
What are some gifts you DO NOT want to receive this Christmas?
What are some of the worst you’ve gotten in the past?
Do share ’em!