December 21, 2007

FUZE Slenderize Guilt Free Lip Gloss

As Seen on Sephora:

This resolution is hardly original. But when beauty is involved, we’ll jump on any bandwagon. Too Faced’s new gloss packs wondrous ingredients that promote appetite-normalization. Swipe it on your lips to help kiss those unwanted pounds goodbye.

You read it here first folks. A gloss that’s going to help me lose weight. I’ll take a case. Wait. Better make that 10 cases! Thanks!

I always thought my appetite was pretty normal but this gloss is actually going to normalize it for me! I dunno what that means but it sure does sound super important. It’s also going to melt away any unwanted cellulite on my hips that I may want to rid myself of plus it’s also going to arrange for World Peace.

Can your gloss do that? What? I can’t make this stuff up people. It’s for reals!

The stupidity of the beauty world never ceases to amaze and delight me this is almost as good as the “breath fresher” lipgloss that was released last year!

I love me some gloss but count the Muse doubtful that a gloss is going to make me skinny!

I’ll eat my words later if this actually works or maybe not as I’ll be too full since my gloss is normalizing my appetite for me!


About the Muse

Isabella MuseIsabella is just an average everyday geeky girl who doesn’t blend her eyeshadow correctly, wears too much blush, and hopes she never finds her holy grail products because she likes the thrill of the chase so much. Her mission is to bring you super honest reviews on makeup, skincare, fragrance and all things beauty. She’s in no way an expert on the topic and she sure as hell isn’t a super model. But she’s passionate about makeup and is seeking like-minded individuals that like pina coladas, getting caught in the rain, and ones that enjoy spending hundreds of dollars at Sephora without feeling buyer’s remorse. If you’re that person feel free to reach out and leave a comment or follow me on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Bloglovin‘.

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  • MandyPandy

    Well, I technically read it at Sephora yesterday, but yeah, it’s just a load of bunk. I’ll stick to binging and purging, thank you!
    JK! Bulimia never causes weight-loss (I should know)!

    I still think it’s the most bizarre lipgloss ever. Jarod Blandino done lost her damn mind; the peroxide has finally reached her brain. Quick, get the bucket of water!

  • Angelique

    …Too Faced just rubs me the wrong way. Sure, I like some of their stuff and I’m happy that they sometimes make blue lipgloss but for the most part their stuff and their attitude just pisses me off. It’s just like Juicy Couture. Both those companies (and their founders) think women should be ultra girly-girl material-obsessed cutesy richbitches. To HELL with that.

    Good lord. It all just makes my head hurt.

  • Millie

    Hi Muse,
    So I got my Lavshuca winter make collection in 01 and PK-1 today and even though I know they’re both small, I’m still slightly disappointed and it’s not as pigmented as i hoped, so I have to layer alot, plus I also need to use my MJ jewel liner to help boost the darker shade. The jewel lipstick color is great, I got it because you suggested it as well as a touch of blusher, but then it’s not as shimmery as i thought it would be. I did order the BE-2 and the loose powder in lucent from adambeauty and I hope the BE-2 is more on the pink side rather than brown, what do you think? since you have such a big collection =D Otherwise I think adambeauty will start getting more orders from me and my mom will get more presents because I won’t use it haha. Speaking of adambeauty, they were nice enough to send me some samples of the Coffert D’or lipsticks, and the PK227 shade looks gorgeous, I just hope it won’t be too pricey. I have a feeling that the BE-2 will look similar to the CD sample of BE178 which is too brown for my taste. Do you think the Lavshuca eyeshadows have good staying power compared to the MJ ones? They look so cute and I’m thinking of getting more but I’m not sure how well they last.

  • Jessika

    I can’t wait to hear your review on this! I too want to shed pounds but doubt that a lip gloss can do it!

  • the Muse

    Hi Mandy!

    Total garbage! But curiosity will kill this cat as I wanna try it!

    I’m nuts to say the least!

    LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You’re a nutter 😉

  • the Muse

    hi krasevayadancer!

    PLEAZE! You’re perfect 😉 I’ve seen your pic on Specktra! You don’t need any of this!


  • the Muse

    hi Angelique,

    I kinda like some too faced products!

    LOL I admit I’m guilty of being girly girly 🙂

    I’m a bit of a tomboy too so I guess that qualifies a bit 😉


  • the Muse

    Hi Millie!

    Aww sorry to hear you’re not loving the pigment on the lavshuca palettes! I guess they aren’t really as pigmented as the normal range! I do love ’em though!

    I’m glad you got the loose powder as it’s been faded out so it’s great you have it. It’s an awesome powder! Hmmm I don’t have it in front of me but I believe be-2 is more of a peachy brown! I think!? Either way it’ll probably be lovely as I haven’t run into a color I didn’t love!

    I believe Coffert D’or will be in the same price range as T’estimo. It’ll probably be normal price on Adam and within Japan probably the regular 20% off at drugstores!

    From what I seen of the collection it’ll be worth what we shell out for it teehee 🙂 It’s quite nice! I’ll miss T’estimo but this is a nice alternative for sure!

    I find that the Lavshuca and MJ shadows are very different in texture. I do believe that the Majolook palettes are sheer and not nearly as pigmented as the Lavshuca select. However, I find the single MJ’s way more pigmented with good staying power compared to the Lavshuca palettes.

    Both are fabulous to be honest and have pretty good staying power! The only ones that I find go on a bit sheer and need a good powder down to stay put would be the Majalook palettes 🙂

    Enjoy your purchases! Hope this helps!


  • the Muse

    Hi Jessika!

    I’ll definately be buying and reviewing it although I’m already skeptical about losing any weight hehehe!

    Thanks for the comment!